Broadway Baby

As some of you know, I love listening to NPR/KQED (local area) and came across in the beginning of this month a great talk about kids. It was on "Forum" and the guest was Po Bronson. What an amazing discussion on his topic called Nurture Shock.

Essentially, it was about how "we" as parents have an innate tendency to overpraise our children. We want our kids to do well. We don't want them to feel like they are not worthy, etc. Instead of making these praises in a general statement, we need to be very specific. Now, I have heard all of this before and I have always tried to be very specific (having been a teacher and school counselor), but it's different when they are your own children. Added to the genetics is the fact that caregivers can get rattled and end up reacting rather than being just present and conscious (a lot harder than most people think when your own children have needs and continue to share them with you). I am guilty of doing the general statements and then catching myself or not. The great thing is that Po Bronson normalizes it.

I loved the information shared on NPR, but what I got out of it is the understanding that we, as mothers, try to do it all and do it all perfectly. Crazy, eh? This leads me to another book I read many years ago by Bruno Bettelheim called "The Good Enough Parent". I learned that if I take the anxiety away from myself trying to be the "forever conscious" parent, then my kids don't get anxious. I"m not saying it's okay to be in zombie-land while parenting all the time, but those that try so hard to be the "great parent" can chill out a bit.

Isn't this great?! Now go have a glass of wine!!! :o)